photo by Oscar Scannell on Unsplash

Stories & Inspiration

“I suck” vs “That’s interesting”

by | Jun 29, 2021

You have heard me talk about the joy in riding, and how important it is to focus on the things that are already working.

Well, what if it’s not going that great? What do you do with that information? For example, you attempted a trot-walk transition and ended up pulling on the reins because it didn’t happen the way you would have liked.

Look at it as if you were telling yourself: “That’s interesting. What just happened?” From a very non-judgmental place, do a little “scan”, ask yourself a few questions like: Did I prepare for that transition? Was I in the right position? etc. And get a sense of why it didn’t happen. Don’t overanalyze it, just get a sense of where things went slightly off, and at the same time also feel which parts worked.

In my online programs, we watch the videos of the participants together to learn from each other. Participants are always very encouraging and supportive until it’s their turn. That’s the only time the participants tend to be negative, pointing out all the things that they feel need improvement.

That’s when I ask the participants to look at their own video the way they have looked at the videos of the other people in the group before. What if you can watch yourself in this encouraging and supportive way? What would you be telling yourself then? How is that different to what you told yourself earlier?

This is non-judgmental self-observation, and it’s so important as it is the only way to really learn in a fun and relaxed way.

When you keep beating yourself up for your mistakes, your system will keep focusing on these mistakes, and it will be much harder to get rid of them.

Let me know how it goes!